While Rage 2 lacks Borderlands signature cell-shaded look, the over the top zany post apocalyptic action seems a lot like Gearbox’s main money maker. Much like with Prey, it seems that Bethesda is doing something a bit different with id’s old IP. Which is fine, Rage was never considered a classis, I just hope it can find a way to differentiate itself from Borderlands. The real question is now that they have resurrected almost all of id’s FPS titles, when are we getting that Commander Keen game?
Alien: Covenant Is The Alien Movie For People Who Don’t Like Alien
I don’t think Ridley Scott really wants to make Alien movies anymore, but he knows if he slaps the Alien name on something people will give him the money to make whatever he wants. With Alien: Covenant, Scott wanted to make a movie about a being’s hatred for its creator, and then he tacked some Alien stuff on to it. It is kind of interesting, but the two conflicting ideas don’t really coalesce in to a coherent film.
Covenant takes place a few years after Prometheus, and the colony vessel Covenant gets a strange message on its way to its new home destination. The crew decides to check it out, and guess what? That was a terrible idea. It turns out that this is where Elizabeth Shaw and David (Michael Fassbender) crash landed with a ship full of the Alien virus. David meets the newer, more obedient, version of himself Walter, and things get very strange. The crew makes more bad decisions, and a lot of them get killed by the xenomorph.
The xenomorph is kind of secondary to what is going on with Walter and David, and it should never be said in an Alien movie that “the” alien is taking a back seat to a robot that clearly has the hots for himself. Like I said Scott brings some interesting ideas to the table, but they are never fully fleshed out, and this never truly feels like an Alien movie. Just one where the Alien is around.
Covenant is beautifully shot, and the special effects are really well done, so Scott still has what it takes to make a major motion picture, but this movie is just kind of a mess. Which is a shame because I wanted to like it. I was one of the seemingly few people that enjoyed Prometheus. Sure it was dumb, but it was dumb fun. This movie forgets the fun, and instead wants to focus on its “themes”.
If you are looking for a good Alien movie, Alien: Covenant is not what you are looking for. If you are looking for some high concept Sci-Fi, you might like this, though it is not realized enough. I enjoyed parts of this film, so if you really like the genre, it is probably worth spending an afternoon checking out, but you won’t really miss much if you skip it. Maybe they will finally get it right with the next one.
Dead Movie Franchises Don’t Tell Tales!
When Disney said they were returning to the series’ roots for Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales, what they really meant is that they were going to forget that On Stranger Tides ever happened (heaven knows we all did) and just copy the highlights of the first films. Like all poor photocopies of an original, the cracks are showing and it has faded quite a bit. Dead Men Tell No Tales was a waste of everyone’s time.
You already know what happens in Dead Men Tell No Tales. Jack will bumble around while crazy set pieces explode and fall apart, all while searching for a magical MacGuffin that will save him from a pirate ship full of undead seamen. The only change this time around is the kid he has teamed up with is the son of Will Turner. Henry Turner (Brenton Thwaites) is hoping that Poseidon’s Trident can save his father from having to serve for all eternity on the Flying Dutchmen. As luck would have it a very smart, very pretty girl Carina Smyth (Kaya Scodelario) is also looking for the Trident, so they will all have to reluctantly team up.
Another fun change for Dead Men Tell No Tales is that Jack has almost no agency of his own. He is not a mastermind playing dumb, he just is dumb. He is being dragged along by these youths, and is now just a bumbling violent drunken nitwit. It is like Johnny Depp and Jack Sparrow have completed their merge in to one another. The thing is, had they written an okay story this all still might have been fine, but that is not the case. Stuff just happens in this movie, and it is all a big coincidence that all these things all just happen at the same time. I understand that all adventure films require a little ‘destiny’ to make them work, but this ‘plot’ completely relies on it, without ever even acknowledging it. All the while stealing things from other movies without even as much as a wink or a nod. Gee I wonder what Carina will say when someone mentions that ‘no man’ can read the map to the Trident.
You should not waste your time watching this movie like I did. Yes, I know it is on Netflix now, and you are looking for a movie to watch with your family, but trust me, there are a lot of better things to watch. It makes me angry that no one even tried to do something fun or original with this film. It could and should be an exciting franchise, but instead everyone involved is willing to let this franchise slide in to mediocrity while they count their money. If Dead Men Tell No Tales then everyone who made this movie must be six feet under.
If Your Game Needs Co-Op To Be Fun, It Is Not That Good Of A Game
I have been playing some Ghost Recon: Wildlands on and off with my friends and family, and it is great fun to play that way, but it is boring to play by myself. It is the usual Ubisoft sandbox and icon vomit of a game. It feels completely uninspired, but add in some friends and all of the sudden I am having a good time. Mostly because my friends are causing all kinds of chaos, interrupting my well thought out plans, or just generally chatting while we play.
Here is the thing though, almost all things are better with your friends. Coffee shops are okay by yourself, you can read a book or get some work done, but add in a few friends and it is a much more enjoyable experience. Hanging out and watching Netflix is better with other people, so it should be no surprise that Icon Hunt: The Game is better with someone crashing a helicopter in to an SUV while you are trying to snipe a couple of narcos.
All I am saying is that for a game to be truly good I should want to play it on my own, and I don’t really get that pull from Ghost Recon: Wildlands. Other games have this problem as well, but you will always see the comment, “It is really good with a couple of friends.” You would hope so, since friends make everything better. It was smart of Ubisoft to include the mode to cover over the issues that Wildlands has, and most games should include co-op if they can, but the game should be the selling point, not your friends.
Jade Empire On The Xbox One Is A Wonderful Way To Revisit A Classic!
When the Original Xbox needed games, specifically RPGs, Microsoft made the savvy decision to have the then independent BioWare create two original games for their systems. The most famous being Mass Effect, but the first game to come out of this partnership was Jade Empire. While Jade Empire was well regarded when it was released, it came out only a few months before the Xbox 360, so a lot of people skipped it, and then it was quickly overshadowed by BioWare’s most famous title the aforementioned Mass Effect only two years later.
While it is true 2K released a Special Edition of Jade Empire for PC in 2007, it just didn’t get the marketing hype that it deserved, and since it was published by Microsoft and then 2K, BioWare’s new owners, EA, never seemed to care much about the Chinese Folklore based RPG, which is a shame. But now if you have an Xbox One, the original has come to backwards compatibility with either a 2x or 4x bump in resolution depending on which Xbox One you play it on, and there are no more frame rate drops. Something that just wasn’t possible on the Original Xbox, and it never came to the 360’s backwards compatibility program for some reason. It is amazing how good this game looks with just a simple res increase.
The game isn’t perfect. It features narrow paths to move between locations and small open areas for fights, so it feels a little restrictive compared to the wide open spaces of modern titles (it makes fellow Xbox title Morrowind feel massive), and the combat is slow until you level up your skills, but the story is fantastic. Sure there are always clear good and bad options, but the neutral choice is usually equally as effective. A rare things for RPGs with morality systems. Not to mention there are so few games that feature Chinese Folklore as their setting, and almost zero of those games are fully featured RPGs.
While I am sure the PC Special Edition of Jade Empire is technically the best version, the original on the Xbox One is a great way to revisit a lost classic, and to make the lust for a sequel that will probably never happen, just that much greater. I rarely like to replay RPGs, but Jade Empire has roped me in again, and I am enjoying every minute of it. If you can find a cheap Jade Empire disk around somewhere, throw it in your Xbox One, you will be glad you did.