Shmee Casts The Suicide Squad!

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With news that Jared Leto is going to be the Joker and Margot Robbie will be Harley Quinn in the new Suicide Squad movie, no doubt as the villains, and Jesse Eisenberg’s Lex Luthor somehow attached, I thought I would do DC a favor and cast the rest of Task Force X for them.  It is a big crew, so it was hard to find good people, but I think I did pretty well.

Deadshot:

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I figure they will need a big name to head this group, and it took me awhile to come up with someone, but I think he will be perfect: Ryan Gosling.  He is young and strong, and he looks good when he is not talking.  All good things for Deadshot.  In case you have been living under a rock here is what he looks like:

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Vixen:

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This one was very easy.  Since they didn’t take my advice on Wonder Woman, I got to use her again: Gina Torres.  She is tough enough to hang with the boys, and you would take her seriously as a hero.

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Captain Boomerang:

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I figure this a good spot to introduce some humor, and why not give someone from TV a chance to get in to the spotlight, so I picked Jensen Ackles.  He is my favorite part of Supernatural, and I am sure he would be a great addition to the Squad.

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Blockbuster:

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Blockbuster is pretty much a villainous Hulk ripoff, but you know what?  A guy with super-strength is always a good addition to the team.  Since you need someone huge for this role if you don’t want to use CG, I went with Randy Couture.  He has been in several movies, and he doesn’t need to bulk-up any more.

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Multiplex:

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I decided that they should pick someone that is already in the DC family, so I went with Cillian Murphy.  He was great as Scarecrow, so why not let him loose as another DC villain, but this time with a bomb in his head and forced to be good!

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Jaculi:

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I wasn’t really sure on who to use with this one, but I dug deep and came up with Adam Beach.  I know he was in Walker Texas Ranger, but we are going to have to get past that.  He has been pretty good in everything else he as been in, so why not the Suicide Squad.

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Mindboggler:

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Last one! Mindboggler.  She is a super minor character, but I thought since she is the only other female member this time around, that I would give her some star power, so my choice is Keira Knightley.  She has done action in the past, and I think she would have a lot of fun in this movie.

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Well that is my Suicide Squad movie team!  What do you think?  Or what choices would you have made?  Or what members would you rather see?  Let me know!

Star Wars: The Force Awakens, What Is In A Title?

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So the new Star Wars movie has a title: The Force Awakens.  I guess we are being lead to believe that the Force has been asleep.  It was really tired after all Force Lightning the Emperor used in the end of Return of the Jedi.  I kid, The Force Awakens is a fine title.  It is not great, but it isn’t bad, and it lets us know that magical laser sword ninjas still exist which is nice.

We only have about a year left until this movie hits theaters, and I can’t wait.  A new Star Wars movie by the guy that turned Star Trek into Star Wars should be great.  He can’t do any worse than the prequel trilogy, so he will have my $15 come Christmas 2015.

Meet Chappie, Short Circuit With Guns!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d1zYws1Zf6U

Neil Blomkamp the director of District 9 has another near future film for us.  This time it is about a self aware robot that hangs out with a bunch of street punks.  Once the evil Hugh Jackman learns about him, he wants to take it out!  It looks like a fun movie, but just about everyone is thinking this is an action-y take on Short Circuit, but you know what?  I am okay with that.

The Paladin gets that Fury… Cuban Fury that is.

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Mrs. The Paladin use to dance, she trained in Ballet, and even was an instructor at a local dance studio; so I have to watch or hear from the other room while I’m hiding on the bedroom a lot of dance movies (she also watches a lot of movies on or about the Holocaust but that isn’t related to dancing – sometimes). So when I saw the trailer for Cuban Fury I knew finally there was a movie for the two for use to enjoy at the same time.

You see, Cuban Fury is a romantic comedy about dancing… Salsa dancing. What’s more, it’s an intelligent romantic comedy about Salsa dancing. The quick rundown is Nick Frost plays Bruce Garrett the adult form of the “Boy with Fire in His Feet”, a teen Salsa dancing sensation who’s given up the fiery shoes for a life of “normalcy”. He’s tormented at work by Chris O’Dowd’s absolutely terrible and awful coworker Drew. He spends his time with his two mates weekly running through a list that reminds us that Bruce and company are not hip with the ladies. Until the American Rashida Jones’s Julia is hired as the new Sales Manager over Bruce and Drew. The obvious attraction to Julia only grows for Bruce when he sees her dancing Salsa. This spurs Bruce to reconnect with his old mentor, played crustily by Ian “Lovejoy” McShane, and reclaim the title of “Boy with Fire in His Feet”. Of course he has to deal with a love triangle, dance-offs, and a body that has forgotten some of the grace it once held.

The thing I love about Cuban Fury is that instead of focusing the comedy on a dancing fat guy, it instead treats Bruce like a real person, who later in life is rediscovering his passion. The reason young Bruce gave up the sequins and silk shirts was that he was badly beaten right before the Regionals, something that enforces the stereotype that boys don’t dance. Bruce then lives a normal life and is actually fairly successful in it, he’s not a loser… just lost. Ultimately the movie isn’t about him winning the girl, which he does *SPOILERS!, but it’s about him pushing through his own barriers to once again find what makes him happy.

Mrs. The Paladin and I laughed a lot through this movie at the situations, characters, and those little silly things that happening in the background or very briefly. There is some swearing and the middle finger is raised a handful of times; things to be aware of for the more discerning viewers out there. Cuban Fury earns Twenty-Four sparkly shirts out of twenty-four sparkly shirts.

Marvel Announces Phase 3!

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Since DC announced its slate of upcoming movies, Marvel had to return the favor with its Phase 3 list, and they are as follows:

May 6, 2016: Captain America: Civil War

November 4, 2016: Doctor Strange

May 5, 2017: Guardians of the Galaxy 2

July 7, 2017: Thor: Ragnarok

November 3, 2017: Black Panther

May 4, 2018: Avengers: Infinity War Part 1

July 6, 2018: Captain Marvel

November 2, 2018: Inhumans

May ?, 2019: Avengers: Infinity War Part 2

That is a crazy list of flicks, and it doesn’t include Avengers: Age of Ultron or Ant Man.  It looks like Marvel is following DC’s idea of having a two part team (Avengers/Justice League) movie.  Though it is hard to see how that is any different than normal considering all the Marvel movies link together in some way.

They did not announce who was going to be Doctor Strange, but they did announce who will be the Black Panther: Chadwick Boseman.  They also said that he will have small roles in the upcoming Captain America and Avengers flicks, so we will be seeing him soon.

I am also very happy to hear that Captain Marvel will be Carol Danvers, so she will get Marvel’s first female led superhero flick.  We will see if they are going to use someone off my list.  Since I am batting zero, I would guess not.  I wonder if Scarlett Johansson is wondering where her movie is, or at least a Black Widow/Hawkeye team-up movie.  I know I would be.

That is an impressive list, and when combined with DC’s list there are going to be a TON of superhero movies, so I hope you are ready for them because it appears they are ready for you.